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Stranger In A Strange Land

sandfFrom as far back as I can remember I have been Greek – with as much English blood in my veins which has at least contributed to my convoluted accent and good looks. During my formative years I was surrounded by just enough of my father’s culture to take a liking to it, from the food and hearing the language to the occasional trip to church (once a year on Easter only). I wasn’t exactly immersed as much as being regularly introduced.

And even though I was born in South Africa in the heart of the East Rand in Germiston City hospital (which I hear now is one big ARV clinic), I didn’t understand the concept of being South African for a very long time.

I was privileged in the sense that my parents worked very hard and spent everything they had practically to send my brother and I to private schools, the majority being spent at Catholic schools (without the baptismal badge of honour to be fully accepted). Being a predominantly “European” school, and I say this because there were not many students with a long family history in South Africa.

I believe there’s an identity crisis lurking in the mind of a first generation child, they cling to their parents culture as the one they respect and know – it defines them for a very long time, and it also sets them apart to an extent. I, for one, always found it very interesting visiting my Italian and Portuguese friend’s houses, having different food and hearing different languages – we were all special and unusual.

At the age of eight I had the amazing opportunity to go to Greece with my father. He was working on a long contract in Australia at the time and we actually met at Athens airport – not something I would recommend to a seasoned traveller, let alone a pre-teen who doesn’t speak a word of Greek.

This isn’t story of cultural differences, however, that would be way too simple.

It was, during that trip that I really started to realise that the country I had been born in was different. I had heard of some problems and questioned every now and again why there would be days on end when the black kids in our class didn’t come to school but I never remember getting a satisfactory answer. I also heard about things like the Equity Ban and riots every now and again, but I was obviously sheltered enough that it didn’t affect my daily life, never mind the fact that I could barely tie my own shoelaces.

lisbonWhat made me open my eyes happened in a sad little hotel room in Lisbon. Portugal wasn’t on our itinerary, except for a brief stopover, but problems arose with my father’s friend’s Mother (we were escorting her from Greece to visit her family in South Africa).

So what was meant to be a few hours ended up becoming a two (maybe three) day bonding experience for us at the Hotel Presidente (2 stars and as dirty as you can imagine a downtown Lisbon hotel to be).

Our luggage was already in South Africa and we really didn’t want to do much, so we sat around in the hotel room and talked a lot.

It was September I believe in 1988, just a month after Adriaan Vlok banned the ECC (End Conscription Campaign) which spurred on protests by UCT students and the confiscation of the Weekly Mail by security police.

It was essentially a blow to my future because as it stood I would still be doing two years forced army service after I finished school. My father explained to me the importance of going to university and getting a good education which would at least make my stay bearable.

I remember asking something along the lines of why my dad didn’t go to the army. And he explained it quite briefly, in that he wasn’t South African when he arrived in the country, he simply didn’t send the papers back and they didn’t bother him.

I wouldn’t have had that choice if the law stayed in effect. I couldn’t even comprehend what it would have been like, it was ten years away and a concept I couldn’t grasp, but even so at eight years old I secretly resented my country.

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  1. Colleen
    Colleen
    July 8th, 2009 at 08:37 | #1

    nice writing, showing great insight, well written altogether Alex!

  2. July 8th, 2009 at 09:14 | #2

    I always wonder – back in the ‘bad old days’, why did foreigners like your parents come to SA? I am honestly curious.

  3. Chris
    Chris
    July 8th, 2009 at 10:31 | #3

    If i may offer my input (story) to that question…
    My grandfathers came from Cyprus to South Africa right after world war 2, economic hardship and the effects of the war drove them to seek a better life here in South Africa and in Zimbabwe. Then in 1976, after the Turkish invasion of Cyprus, my grandparents move to SA was cemented as my family had lost their home and the country was still in recovery for many years. Moving back to Cyprus was no longer an option. So they stayed, and now i am a second generation South African.

    Nice piece Alex.
    You were a very sensitive young boy (secretly hating your country)…

  4. Cloudgazer
    The Cloudgazer
    July 8th, 2009 at 11:21 | #4

    ah, the army issue. A dark cloud that hung over school boys for years. I was lucky to catch the tail end of it, and only had to do one year in the army.
    Nice piece Alex.

  5. Chatsubo
    Chatsubo
    July 8th, 2009 at 11:31 | #5

    I guess, being Afrikaans, my parents were probably bitter-sweet about the looming army years ahead of their boys. On one hand we were going to do the great Afrikaner patriotic thing, On the other their children would be coming in harms way. However I can confirm that the premise held no idealism in me. I didn’t want to go to the army, and I was very relieved when the laws were changed.

  6. Wendy
    Wendy
    July 8th, 2009 at 11:45 | #6

    Great piece, and perspective Alex.

    I had Greek, Portuguese and Chinese friends at school in Jozi (not in Cape Town interestingly enough) – too young then to understand the identity schism, it’s interesting to ponder now. I did, however, envy their “exotic” gene pool. It seemed quite glamorous to me at the time!

    Being a girl, the army issue didn’t affect me at all. But I remember a sense of relief from the guys in my matric year – conscription ended in ‘93, so they missed it by the skin of their teeth. Also it was reassuring that my boet wouldn’t have to go. I think my parents were relived most of all. At the same time, I kinda admire that Israeli girls have to do army training. “Well, now, I too need structure. A little fucking discipline.”

  7. Gary
    Gary
    July 8th, 2009 at 12:02 | #7

    If it hadn’t been for the changing of the laws I would’ve been in the army in 1994. Which, if what I’ve heard is correct, was not a good time to be there. I hear older people talking with fondness of their times in the military, but most of those stories are from peace times. They tend not to talk about the times when other people were firing back. And in 1994, there were quite a few times when that happened.

    I also hear them talking about how the modern generation have no discipline, how they need to bring back conscription. I think that’s a load of bull twang. The discipline issue is one that can be addressed in other ways. To me, conscription was simply a waste of time. I don’t want to be a soldier, I never did, and those years spent in the army would’ve been years better spend elsewhere.

  8. July 8th, 2009 at 14:55 | #8

    @Gary, I too have heard the stories about how good the army was for people etc..etc.. I also had a history teacher who spent time in Angola and flipped out every now and again throwing desks around and breaking them with his barehands after telling us stories about how they used to tie captured enemies to the front of their jeeps and drive through bush to get information out of them.

    I don’t mind the military at all, I do like having a choice though.

    @Diva, I believe that the “regime” was making it very easy for Europeans to come into the country – it was a land of opportunity at that time for white people, whether to increase numbers or actually provide skilled and educated work. I hear that immigrants were treated quite badly by certain “afrikaners”, especially the rooinek kids.

  9. Pablo Masie
    Pablo Masie
    July 8th, 2009 at 16:23 | #9

    So the editor has spoken, very insightful to say the least…sometimes you have to be outside to see the inside which is what happened…Good one sir!

  10. Wendy
    Wendy
    July 8th, 2009 at 17:19 | #10

    @Gary: I completely agree that discipline doesn’t only come from the army. It starts at home. The quote is from “American Beauty”, so perhaps the context of my comment makes a little more sense – tongue-in-cheek.

  11. Carla Nunes
    Carla Nunes
    July 8th, 2009 at 18:21 | #11

    Blady Lisbon hotels!!!

    Nice story. It seems for most South Africans there wasn’t a dramatic defining moment that epitomised being South African.

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